I wanted to throw up.
Here I was sitting in a room full of well-known evangelical leaders saying positive things about then- candidate Donald Trump, talking as if he was the best hope for all Americans.
Of course, none of them could publicly “endorse” him, but their exuberance for him was obvious.
How could they be so blinded? Did they not see what I could see? Did they not see Trump was contrary to everything they stood for…so contrary to Christ?
Many of them I highly respected. Many were mentors in the faith – ones who had taught me so much about hearing God.
How is it they were hearing something so radically different than me? Especially after I had clearly heard the complete opposite.
Some of them talked about the many private hours they had spent with Trump and how he really listened to them and was respectful. They talked about his love for ALL Americans.
What? You’re kidding me, right?
I wanted to stand up and shout, “You fools!!! Don’t you realize he’s manipulating you? As soon as he wins, you’re all gone. You’re just pawns!”
Of course, then they’d know my secret. Continue reading
One of my biggest fears in writing this blog is that it would keep me from taking the time to complete my book. Unfortunately, that fear has come true. Therefore, to avoid spending an inordinate amount of hours writing major thesis points for individual blogs, I am starting a much simpler series I call “Honest Random Musings.” This is the first as a begin to refocus some of my time on the book.
A major part of my job is to do pre-scheduled phone calls every week with well-known speakers, authors and occasionally celebrities.
As an extreme introvert, this absolutely terrifies me.
I really like people – I just don’t like talking to them. Or more precisely, it’s very excruciating trying to come up with something to actually say.
And as my fellow introverts will attest, phone calls are the worst.
This is compounded by the very fact that the people I am talking to are known for their incredible speaking abilities.
It’s like sending someone into a real war zone naked and armed only with a rubber band gun and no rubber bands. Continue reading
The nomad and his wife made their journey toward a dangerous foreign land. Behind them a severe famine threatened to overtake them. Before them resided a people with a deadly reputation.
The man had heard stories before of their barbaric acts; he knew that if they found out this beautiful woman with him was his wife they would likely kill him in order to take her as their own.
To stay behind meant certain death by starvation for both. To move forward and tell the truth would seal his fate by sword.
Fearful of the consequences, Abram and his wife Sarai determined one small act of deception might serve to spare their lives.
What other choice did they have? It was the practical thing to do.
After all, these were desperate times.
And desperate times often call for desperate measures….and a little bit of compromise, right?
One of the things I’ve come to learn as a Christian is that many moral decisions are not always as clear cut as I would hope or as straightforward as the church would often have you believe.
The current political season is no exception in terms of complexity.
As the selection of final candidates winds down to two individuals whose rhetoric, behaviors and values often seem to contradict the message of Christ, many of my fellow Christians are asking what to do. Continue reading
I don’t know quite how to say this, we’ve been together so long, but lately over the last several days…I’m just not feelin’ it.
No, this isn’t some kind of break up notice, for we’ve been through too much together for that. And we’ve had some pretty amazing times.
This isn’t a crisis of faith – though I’ve said I’m “losing my religion,” my belief and trust in you is stronger than ever.
You’ve not done anything recently to offend me. You’ve not thrown me under the bus. You’ve not cheated on me nor lied to me nor wreaked any personal major havoc.
It’s not that I have some theological issue with your allowance of suffering and such; you and I have worked our way through that. It’s not that I’m troubled about seeming contradictions I’ve read; we’ve talked about those, too.
You and I have had knock down fights before and moments where I’ve nearly walked away. I’ve screamed at you and cursed as well and nearly thrown in the towel. But it’s not quite like that at all this time.
It’s just that my feelings for you, over really even the last couple weeks, can best be described as…meh. Continue reading
One of my more memorable experiences with the “supernatural” or the “miraculous” occurred early in my Christian walk. I was struggling with some overwhelming issues late one night when I heard God tell me to “go out to the church and pray.”
This was not just any church; it was a beautiful church that sat up on a hill overlooking Lake Travis in Austin. Ironically, I had never actually attended this church, but had several times gone out there to pray, sitting in my car in the parking lot. It was also the very parking lot (as shared in 2 of my previous posts: “Why I Was Kicked Out of Vacation Bible School” and “Losing My Religion”) where for the first time I heard the “voice” of God.
Now God was calling me back to that same place, presumably to hear his voice again. Continue reading
I’m writing this just a little after 4 in the morning. I confess this was not within my plan. All of my other posts have been meticulously planned out in my head for months, each with a certain timing, a certain purpose – all part of a much greater plan. But not this one. I had never planned, or even hoped, to write it at all, and certainly not on a different day of the week. I don’t even know that I even have anything specific to teach or that there’s a point – just some random, and perhaps desperate, 4 am thoughts.
But I promised I would be honest and real…and so here I am. You see just after 7am my youngest son, Chase, will be getting up, or perhaps he may not. For the past week it has been quite a struggle and it’s starting to become routine. We wake him up to get ready for school, and sometimes he gets going and sometimes he does not – almost always I end up spending anywhere from 30 minutes to hours, encouraging him that he can make it through at least this day. Welcome to depression. Continue reading
or….Thanks, God, For the Really Sucky Years
(Welcome to my blog part 1 of 2)
I’m not gonna lie to you….half of what I’m going to tell you throughout this blog site is a lie. What??? Steve, you’re starting out this blog called “Honestly Thinking” by telling me you can’t really be trusted (not to mention the contradictory sentence and bad grammar)?? Yes…and no…and not exactly. I promise to always be honest with you, but that means telling you up front that a big percentage of what I say to you I don’t fully believe myself. In other words, I constantly tell lies to myself. I’m a hypocrite. What I say I believe and what I actually end up doing are often two different things. That’s because what I truly believe in my head doesn’t always transfer to what I truly believe in my heart and vice versa; thus, I continually end up living a contradictory life. Continue reading